Bachelor In Paradise - Episode 1 Viewing Guide

Hello to all,

So with all the craziness going on in the world, rather than revive my blog with a semi-intelligent post about any of it, I have instead decided to blog about the current season of Bachelor In Paradise.

Why, you ask?

Because it’s a train-wreck of a show, among other reasons that I’ll go into in a future post.  Suffice to say that I love people watching, I love analyzing others’ relationships, and I like sharing my thoughts.

The general premise is this.  Each week, 12 attractive yet single men and women (6 men and 6 women) get to stay in “paradise” each week (paradise defined as a resort town in Mexico where the guests don’t have to think about any of the political or social problems facing Mexico right now).  Each week, at least one new person is introduced and at least one person is sent home.  For example, if the new person is female, then a female will be sent home at the end of the week to maintain the balance of 6 and 6. 

Contestants are trying to find “love” and not get sent home because they weren’t able to find said love.  Of course, a week is a pretty quick timeframe to find love, so let’s call it the quest to find “good enough until hopefully something better comes along next week.”

I’m a little behind in my viewing.  Maybe you haven’t watched the first episode yet.  If not, here’s a link to episode 1:

Since I’m behind, I’m stealing an idea from one of my favorite internet writers, Bill Simmons, and kept a running diary of the show.  (Times are based on my DVR and have not been adjusted for commercial breaks.)

0:01    Here we go.  And we’re starting with the crazy one – Clare from Juan Pablo’s season.  I pegged her as batshit crazy (or guano crazy) from episode 1 of that season. 

It’s like on a cd.  You want the first song to make a splash.  Can’t go wrong with Clare. 

0:02    And now Marcus, the stalker from Andi’s season!  Wow.  What a 1-2 punch.  Boom BOOM.  We just saw from the “Men Tell All” episode that he has not moved on from Andi.  This can’t end well.  I HATE his flip flops by the way.

I should point out that “stalker” is not the appropriate term for Marcus.  He got way obsessive with Andi WAY too early.  He’s 25 and just struck me as way too inexperienced to try dating on a reality show.

0:03    Sarah is new to me – I didn’t see the season she was on.  Like most people seeing her for the first time, I notice that she has only one full arm. 

0:03    Interesting reaction by Marcus to Marquel coming to the bachelor pad.  They know each other from Andi’s season.  I’m very interested in seeing how the dynamics play out between friends from previous seasons.

 

Personally, I loved Marquel and what he brought to Andi’s season of Bachelorette.  He has good energy.  And the way he dealt with Andrew’s alleged racist comments was incredibly thoughtful, mature, and educational.  I know that it has been difficult for people of color on the Bachelor/Bachelorette in the past, so I wonder how this show will go for Marquel (who is Black).  I’m skeptical of him being on Bachelor in Paradise because there’s so much potential for the whole thing to be a complete shitshow.  I don’t want my image of him to get tarnished.

0:04    Daniella just entered.  I don’t know her from the previous season she was on (I only watched the last two Bachelor/Bachelorettes), but I’ll tell you this much, she doesn’t look comfortable from the get go.  I don’t believe a word that she says.  She’s lacking in self-confidence.  And doesn’t seem too smart either.

I loved that Marquel says, “I hug.  I hug.”

0:05    Graham walks in.  He’s new to me, too.  Interesting – he’s by far the oldest guy here.  He’s 35.  Oh, maybe not by far since Clare is 33.  I think that the older male contestants tend to do MUCH better than anyone else.  They just seem to understand themselves.

0:05    Wait, who the fuck was Lacy on Juan Pablo’s season?  I saw that whole season and I can’t place her at all.  She seems somewhat down-to-earth and naturally the other women hate her already.

0:11    Just noticed that Lacy has a TINY cross around her neck.  Was she wearing that the first time she was on screen and I just didn’t notice because I (and everyone else) was staring at other parts of her anatomy?  I feel like a bad person.  But I also feel like she should wear a cross that is more proportional to the rest of that area of her body.

(I went back and checked.  It was there when she walked up.  I am a bad person.  See below, you can BARELY see the cross.)

 

Our “here for the right reasons” count is up to one.

0:13    Robert and Michelle arrive separately.  Michelle sounds outspoken and it seems like the women will hate her.  Robert seems like he’ll be around for a while because he’s attractive and not a boat-rocker.

Also of note, the ratio of white people to people of color is now 9 to 1.

And now another troubled yet nice guy walks in from Andi’s season.  Dylan.  I liked him. 

0:13    First unintentionally telling moment.  When Dylan and Sarah end their hug, you can see some of the fragility that Sarah has when people see that she has one arm.  Or at least that’s how I’m interpreting it.  That look of, “I don’t want to have to explain this to another person.”  It’s quick and fleeting – go back and watch Sarah’s eyes after the hug.  She never looks back at Dylan, just looks away to the left to avoid eye contact.  Maybe he stared too long at her arm when he walked up.  Either way, they have no connection.

0:14    What the hell is Elise wearing?  Is that a pantsuit or a 90s jazzercise outfit?  Or both?  NOT well thought out.  Oh, it is a dress.  Not that flattering.

And what the heck is that hug thing that Elise has going on?  When she puts her arm around someone, she does a quick rub/squeeze thing on their shoulder blade/back.  That’s not how you hug!!

0:15    Seriously?  AshLee?  Who spells their name like that?  Her parents must have hated her.  And is that what bad Botox looks like?  She just seems too puffy.  And her mascara is not flattering either.

 

0:16    A guy ALREADY HAS HIS SHIRT OFF?  I think that’s Robert?  He’s already shown that he doesn’t feel comfortable and needs to show off his body (which, I will admit, is very nice).

0:23    It’s always interesting to see the group when they walk together.  Who’s with who?  Graham and Ben seem to have flocked toward each other.  Marquel, Marcus, and Dylan who all know each other are together.  Marquel and Sarah are talking as they walk.  Clare is in-between the two hottest guys.  And Lacy is on her own making sure that her too-small bikini top doesn’t fall off.

0:24    I don’t believe a word that Daniella says.  Her eyes give her away.  She doesn't mean anything that she says.  Also the ratio of whites to people of color is 12 to 1.  Well done, Bachelor Franchise. 

0:24    I love the look on Lacy’s face.  It’s like someone else in the group said something incredibly stupid and she’s trying to understand what they meant.

0:26    Marcus has the darkness again!  And he’s now naked in the ocean?  Practically.  I guess that’s therapy for not fully being over Andi.  Or it’s an invitation to the ladies to join him.

0:30    There goes Lacy to join him.  I like that she is totally boy crazy.  Once again, though, who the fuck is Lacy?

0:31    I hope Sarah stays around for a while.  I like what she has to say.  And she knows that being physically forward doesn’t get you love, it just gets attention.  She seems to have a good head on her shoulders.

0:32    What the fuck?  Robert is saying, “he’s stealing my girl” after he and Lacy were in the ocean together earlier in the day?  How is she his property?  How is he paying so little attention to “his girl” that she managed to escape his attention on night one to go jump in the ocean with Marcus.  Looks like Lacy made a decision to go flirt with another boy.

0:33    Lacy couldn’t find a bikini top that fit?  Serious underboobage right now.  Also, I respect that Robert went to talk to Lacy directly rather than get all steamed by himself.

0:34    Elise takes her fate in her own hands and pounces on Dylan.  She already admitted that she had a crush on him since last season.  Do we have another stalker on our hands?

0:35    First kissing – Elise and Dylan – being viewed by Marcus and Clare (who I would love to see as a couple).  Marcus breaks the fourth wall by saying that what they were watching was better than reality tv.

0:40    AshLee is ALSO a stalker to go along with Marcus and Elise (kind of).  How the heck could you look AshLee in the eyes?  I guess we have Lady StaLker and Obsessive Marcus (OM).

0:42    I guess I missed the latest fashion trends.  The new thing for women is bikini tops with frills?  Or whatever it is that Lady StaLker is wearing.

 

0:42    OK, so Clare gets the first date card and asks Graham to go on the date with her.  But now Lady StaLker is all hurt that Graham said yes.

0:44    And Lady StaLker is showing her true colors.  Wow.  You’re on fucking reality show where people are supposed to find love and date each other.  You expect a guy to be devoted to you after an afternoon of talking?  Nothing turns a guy off faster than that.  At least the tears made her mascara look better. 

0:46    Lady StaLker is crazy, but if anyone could take the crazy, it’s Clare.  She practically invented crazy.  And as if to illustrate it, Clare is now having a heart to heart WITH HERSELF about not wanting drama on the show. It’s like Smeagol talking to himself at the end of The Two Towers.  The editors are making it look like she’s talking to a raccoon.  Maybe this is a plug for Guardians of the Galaxy?  Either way, it’s fucking amazing!  Though I'm not TOTALLY buying it.  I think this is just crafty editing to make her look crazy.

0:53    I feel bad for any guy who has ever dated AshLee.  The only way she can keep them is by guilting them into being with her.  At least Graham knows that she’s totally crazy.  Hopefully he’s old enough to have learned to not try to make things right but to cut the cord quickly!

0:55    Quote by Crazy Clare: “I don’t know what a vista is”.  WTF?!?  Your family speaks Spanish.  You live in Sacramento.  You don’t know what a vista IS?  That’s like saying, “I’ve never been in the ocean before.”  (oh right, you said that, too, with Juan Pablo)

0:57    During their date, Robert doesn’t quite seem into Clare.  He seems like he’s hedging a bit.

1:02    Lacy went from wearing way too flattering to way too unflattering.  And she likes Marcus.  Who is dark and brooding and obsessive.  And he’s never found the right girl (except for Andi) but he thinks that Lacy could be the one.  Ever wonder what the start of a downward spiral looks like?

1:03    What happened to Marquel and Dylan?  And Michelle K.?  And Ben?  Are they asleep somewhere?

1:06    Sarah is super cute on her date with Marcus.  I’m rooting for her.

1:08    Who is this in a pant suit made out of tissue paper?!  Michelle Money.  Who is she?  I feel like I should know her, but I don’t.

1:14    I can’t take AshLee’s face.  I have to look away.

1:15    Why don’t Marquel and Lacy get their cute little crosses together so that their crosses can date?

1:18    Is Mich Money interested in Marquel or Ben?  I’m hoping for Marquel.

1:19    YES!  Though she needs less make-up.

1:25    Mich Money and Marquel make a cute couple.  Wait…  Again with the frills on the bikini top?!

1:26    So all the guys have made a choice except Ben and Marcus. 

1:27    Oh Lacy, I had such hope for you.  But ever since you said that you were “80-40” on Robert vs Marcus, I just can't take anything you say seriously.  I wish you had paid attention in math class because your stock has fallen dramatically for me. And believe it or not, but if you shaved your head, you'd look EERILY close to Smeagol.  (yes, two Smeagol references in this one post)

 

1:28    And Robert isn't all that bright either.  It’s not “let’s cheers” it’s, “let’s make a toast” or “cheers” or “let’s say cheers”.  Saying "let's cheers" is like saying, “Let’s bon apetit.”  We’ll call them Dumb and Dumber.

1:29    Is this the start of a really bad love triangle?  Marcus is an obsessive guy and you can see that he’s started obsessing over Lacy already.  Dylan is giving him good advice to stay away and play hard to get, but I don’t think he’s listening.  Lacy is both conniving and attention seeking, but with that hair.  Meanwhile Robert is taking what he can get and is enjoying the attention he’s getting from her.  Maybe Marcus and Robert should go on a date.

1:30    Dylan is giving GREAT advice.  Too bad that Marcus won’t listen.

1:35    OK, so going into the rose ceremony cocktail party, here are my predictions (guys handing out roses):

           

            Marquel picks Mich Money

            Dumber picks Dumb/Smeagol

            Dylan picks Elise (though he may pick Clare)

            Graham picks AshLee (though he should pick Clare)

            Marcus picks Sarah

            Ben picks Michelle K (because they made a pact)

            As she leaves, Daniella will tell the camera that she wasn’t attracted to any of the guys

            And Clare somehow gets a second chance because there’s no way that she’s leaving already

           

1:37    AshLee really just said conversating?  I dislike her intensely.

1:40    It hurts to hear Marcus tell Sarah that he has no interest in her but that she deserves a rose anyway.  She's already said that the only guy she's interested in (of those available) is Marcus.  And when she hears that he isn't interested, she sells herself out by saying, that’s ok, I’ll take the rose.

1:41    Is Lacy really playing the love triangle game?  Take a close look when she and Robert walk past Marcus and Dylan.  She’s a little behind Robert and shoots a very flirtatious look at Marcus that seems to say yes, come play in my little triangle (double entendre TOTALLY intended).  It looks like she took Robert on the one-on-one date earlier only to make Marcus jealous.

1:42    Revised predictions now that everyone has had their one on one time:

            Marquel picks Mich Money

            Marcus picks Dumb/Smeagol

            Dylan picks Elise

            Graham picks AshLee (though he should pick Clare)

            Dumber picks Clare

            Ben picks Daniella

            Sarah is hurt

            Michelle K is like whatever

1:43    Marquel looks like he’s a ventriloquist’s dummy in his purple plaid outfit with suspenders.  I wish I could find a picture of this.

1:47    Huh.  So you are ALLOWED to decline a rose.  Interesting.

1:49    OK, so Michelle K would rather not get rejected and so she just pre-empted the whole thing by leaving.

1:51    The lightning strike right as Graham picked Lady StaLker was quite apropos.  Graham’s such a wuss.

1:52    Marcus gets to give a rose before Dumber.  He’s too young to know to stay out of games.  I predict that he’s going with Dumb.

1:53    Yup.  I was right!

1:54    Man, this sucks.  I liked Sarah the best.  She should stay.  But I predict that Ben is going with Daniella, right?  WRONG!  So happy to be wrong.

1:56    It’s interesting who everyone hugs first after the rose ceremony.  Dumb and Dumber.  Sarah and Ben.  Marquel and Mich Money.

I was 7 for 8 on my last set of predictions.  Not bad.  Then again, it wasn’t too hard to guess.

Stay tuned for next week where Michelle K comes back and someone gets arrested?  I know I should just look away, but I already can’t.

Suhail Just Exploded My Head

Consider my last post invalid.

All you have to do is play this one They Might Be Giants song.

ka-boom

New Bar Game - Exploding Ringo's Head

Some people, when they go to bars, like to play more traditional games: shuffleboard, pool, darts, bar brawl*, liar's dice, Frottage!, Is The Roofie In Your Drink Or Mine?.

I like to play a game that I made up called "Explode Ringo's Head." (mostly safe for work)
* I wanted to use this link, but it isn't entirely safe for work.  (And speaking of NSFW, all the links in this are safe for work unless stated otherwise.) 

This game originated at my place when Ringo and I were living together and neither of us worked in the morning.  I would attempt to play the most random song playlist in an effort to get Ringo to react in some way, shape, or form.  The only rule was that each song had to be the "polar opposite" of the previous song.

For example... (and by the way, if you think all of the below links are to the actual songs, well why don't you test out your little theory)

1. Gustav Holst - The Planets: Jupiter
2. Rebecca Black - Friday
3. Eminem - Cleanin' Out My Closet
4. Bonnie Raitt - Let's Give Em Something To Talk About
5. Deadmau5 - Ghosts N Stuff
6. Billy Joel - It's Still Rock And Roll To Me
7. The Cure - Why Can't I Be You

Now if you get really ambitious, you can throw some subtlety into your playlist.  For example, instead of going from Deadmau5 to Billy Joel, you could have instead played Huey Lewis's Ray Parker, Jr.'s Ghostbusters to stay with a ghost theme.  Or if you wanted to get REALLY subtle, you would have chosen The Righteous Brothers - Unchained Melody, as a reference to what this is referencing.


Try this at a bar sometime.  It is fun... and a little bit scary because you might get your ass kicked.  Put about 10-15 songs in the jukebox with this pattern and wait to see how long it takes people to come up to put new music in the jukebox.  Here are two playlists that I've actually done in public...

With Toben on July 4th at Kennedy's:

1. Temple of the Dog - Hunger Strike
2. Daft Punk - Harder, Better,  Faster, Stronger
3. Charlies Daniels Band - Devil Goes Down To Georgia
4. LMFAO - Party Rock Anthem
5. Willie Nelson - You Were Always On My Mind
6. Robert Palmer - Simply Irresistible
7. Duck Sauce - Barbara Streisand
8. Fleetwood Mac - Rhiannon
9. Metallica - Enter Sandman
10. Owl City - Fireflies
11. Radiohead - Paranoid Android

Strangely enough, there was no visible reaction at the bar.  We had failed.

At Kat's birthday back in 2010 at O'Greenberg's:

1. Lady Gaga - I Like It Rough
2. Led Zeppelin - Dazed and Confused
3. 2Pac - Gangsta Party (DEFINITELY not safe for work)
4. Air Supply - Makin Love Out Of Nothing At All
5. Jimi Hendrix - All Along The Watchtower
6. Edith Piaf - Hymne a L'amour
7. Pink Floyd - Another Brick in the Wall
8. James Brown - Get On Up
9. Janis Joplin - Me and Bobby McGee
10. Rage Against The Machine - Testify

People came up to the jukebox at #6.  WIN!!


(I am open to suggestions for other links to use in this post.)

The 2% Challenge

In my "new" line of work, I see a lot of different tax returns.  One of the things I look for on a tax return is the amount that someone will deduct as charitable contributions relative to their gross income.  In some cases, people are very generous.  In others, I'm surprised to see how little they give*. 

As I consider my own tax returns, I think of times when my charitable contributions have been low and when they've been higher.  Even when I've tried to be more intentional about my giving, I have not always made contributions at the level that I would like.  So I am setting a goal for myself that I am calling The 2% Challenge.  Or for more dramatic effect...

THE 2% CHALLENGE

My goal for this year, next year, and the foreseeable future is to donate 2% of my gross salary (before taxes) to charitable organizations.  2% is kind of an arbitrary number, but I wanted to pick something that would be ambitious, but achievable.

Like most goals, it is often helpful to have partners to hold each other accountable and to provide encouragement.  I invite anyone to join me by setting a similar goal for themselves!

I understand that the prospect of donating 2% of your gross salary is not feasible for everyone.  Many of you are raising kids, paying off school debt, paying off mortgages, or otherwise may not be able to afford 2%.  But any goal for giving more than you already are is good.  If you would like to set a similar goal (1% of your gross, 2% of your salary after taxes), anything you do is fantastic.  I won't ask for details about your finances, but I can help you figure out a good goal (and talk about tax benefits to giving, too).

And who says giving money is the only way to participate?  You can set a goal of volunteer hours/days and participate that way, too. 

Whether or not you participate, I would love to hear about the organizations that you support and how you got involved with them.  I would like to share these organizations in another blog post in the future and also with anyone who would like to participate in the 2% Challenge if they need suggestions for organizations to give to.

Thanks for reading and for your responses!
Josh


* I also recognize that there are reasons why people may not report all of their charitable giving on their tax returns.  Some people may not get much of a deduction due to the Alternative Minimum Tax.  Others may feel that giving is "tainted" if they get a tax deduction for it. 

Occupy After One Year

Disclaimer: My world view is liberal. While this post will not delve into the presidential race or politics directly, I know that my liberal inclinations will come through in what I write. Clearly, I am comfortable sharing these opinions and I am definitely open to discussion with anyone reading this. If you, however, do not want to read anything that may offend you, consider yourself warned.

I am not the first person to talk about the one-year anniversary of Occupy.  I am not the most qualified person to talk about this.  I suggest that you read these far more eloquent and informed reflections on Occupy SF.  But since you're here now...

I attended two Occupy SF rallies last year, both on nights when the police were threatening to break up the encampment.  I was not heavily involved in Occupy and I did not camp out.  Having attended definitely raised my awareness about the movement, but in no way do I feel qualified to speak on Occupy's behalf.  My motivation for writing this post is three-fold:

1. I want to reflect on the Occupy movement and share my perspectives
2. I want to call attention to the one year anniversary of Occupy for those of you for whom it may have flown under the radar, and
3. I have a few follow-up posts that I will be writing in the next few weeks that were inspired by my participation in Occupy.

A year after it began, the question of “What did Occupy accomplish?” is a natural one to ask. For many people, it was unclear what Occupy’s goals even were, making the question of 'what was accomplished' a strange one to ask.

In my opinion, Occupy's most important accomplishment was that it introduced a new voice to the national narrative. Occupy's voice was different from most voices that make up the national narrative because it represented a broader and more diverse cross-section of the United States.  The typical voices are the vocal minority and the most vocal of those leading up to Occupy had been from the Tea Party movement.  Occupy dramatically altered the national narrative. But more on that in a moment.

When I say the “national narrative,” I am talking about a description of what is happening in the United States from a broader perspective. The national narrative, in my mind, is a big picture approach that ignores much of the "chatter." For example, during the presidential campaign, so much is made of whose attack ad said what, what gaffe was made by a candidate, and how that was unfairly covered by different news organizations.  This is all simply chatter and most of the time it doesn't mean anything.  The national narrative for this presidential campaign centers on how the candidates are seen on a broader scale.  Obama is an inspirational speaker and leader who has not accomplished everything he had promised in 2008.  Romney is a successful businessman who comes from a privileged background and has struggled to connect with voters.  Both Romney and Obama have presented themselves as more conservative candidates than either of their political records indicate.  We can get lost in debate over why Obama hasn't accomplished everything he promised or who has been affecting Romy's ability to connect with voters, but none of this alters the overall narrative.

The national narrative should not be confused with a historical perspective. The historical perspective is an even broader picture, and from that perspective much of the “national narrative” becomes chatter.

It's very similar to using Google Maps and zooming out further and further.  Daily news stories would be zoomed all the way in, and the view of the entire western hemisphere is the historical perspective.  National narrative is the midway point between the two.

In the year prior to the beginning of the Occupy movement, much of the narrative was from the Tea Party conservatives. The midterm elections of 2010 showed the influence of the Tea Party movement and in early 2011, the effects of that election were beginning to be felt. Occupy, if nothing more, countered the Tea Party movement. For all the talk by Tea Partiers about the tyranny of taxes, Occupy brought the idea of the 99% and called attention to the widening income gap between the ultra-rich and the rest of the country. [And believe me, I recognize both movements were about more than the sweeping generalization that I just used.]

[Addition to my original post - I think it is important to explain a couple things here.  First, I am doing a comparison of Occupy and the Tea Party because of the timing of their messages, but Occupy was not a response to the Tea Party.  I do think that the emergence of the Tea Party played a part in the formation of Occupy, but indirectly so.  Second, while the Tea Party is a part of the Republican Party, Occupy rejected the notion of having a political affiliation.  Many of Occupy's participants are politically liberal, but one of the central points of Occupy was that the current political system incentivizes politicians to seek personal financial gain to the detriment of what is good for the US citizenry.  An affiliation with the Democratic Party would lead to more "business as usual" in DC.]
But where the Tea Party movement had a focused message, Occupy was the expression of general dissatisfaction. To a politician, a focused message made by an easily identifiable group is easy to understand.  You can easily identify the constituency that is "speaking" and what they want.  In contrast, a sustained rally based on general dissatisfaction is much more disconcerting to a politician.  It is much harder to address because the constituency is diverse and their desired outcomes are difficult to identify.  When a diverse population rallies like Occupy did, people in positions of power take notice.

If I tell you that I'm organizing a march on City Hall protesting the passing of a controversial bill that will make it illegal for people to lay down or sleep on sidewalks, you might show up for the one rally, feel like you did something, and then go home. Heck, you can even bring your gun to show your support for gun rights even though it isn’t part of the protest.

But if I tell you that I don’t like how politicians are running this country, that corporations have too much power (and that they're the ones who are actually running this country), that foreclosures are out of control, that we need laws to protect the rights of everyone, that politicians should not be able to use special knowledge of government policies for financial gain in the stock market, and that maybe we should get rid of corporations altogether… and that to protest this, I am organizing a group to camp out in cities across the country indefinitely (without even mentioning that the group may possibly get tear-gassed, arrested, or beaten).  You'd probably be inclined to let someone else do it.

And yet, tens of thousands of people DID do it... for a couple of months.

Occupy was a broad movement with a broad set of interests – the hardest type of group to mobilize and sustain. It needed a central message to become part of the national narrative, and “We Are The 99%” propelled Occupy into that narrative. If Occupy drew the attention of Homeland Security, then you know for sure that it gained the attention of politicians throughout the country. Occupy does not have a single act to “hang its hat on” like the Tea Party movement has the 2010 midterm elections.  But Occupy has made accomplishments directly on a local level (most notably with banks re-structuring mortgages and helping to address the debt crisis) and indirectly by altering the national narrative. A year later, "We are the 99%" still echoes throughout the United States.



As always, thank you for reading.  I am sometimes hesitant talking about divisive topics in a public forum because I worry that my friends who disagree with me will interpret my words as a judgment of them (which it is not).  If you do decide to respond publicly, I ask that you are respectful of anyone else who has responded.  Below are a couple other thoughts I'd like to share as addenda to this post.

Josh


First, I would not have this perspective if Evelyn hadn't invited me out to two rallies in San Francisco early on in our relationship.  Attending these rallies made the Occupy movement more than just a topic I read about online.

Second, about ten months ago, I emailed a fair amount of people sharing my experiences at the two evenings I attended.  I received many supportive responses to my email and had intended to respond to everyone who had emailed me.  I also intended to follow up my email with other messages.  Unfortunately, my intentions resulted in inaction.  Thank you to those of you who did take the time to read my email and respond so thoughtfully.  I am sorry that I did not respond to most of you.

Time For A Tragedy

Over a year ago, one of my friends posed a question to me (and other friends of his), "What is the group noun for hipsters?"

Ok, full disclosure, I had no idea what the question even meant - I wasn't familiar with the term 'group noun' so I asked him to explain.  He gave me several examples, there's a pod of whales, a pack of wolves, a murder of crows, a school of fish, etc.  So what is it for hipsters?


I have the answer.  The only answer.  Introducing...

A Tragedy of Hipsters

When I first came up with this a while ago, I was content to just let it be something that a couple of us laughed at.  But now, I want everyone to start using this.  So please do me a favor, every time you see hipsters walking or gathering somewhere in a group, point them out and say, "hey, check out that tragedy."  I've done it a couple times now, it's remarkable how good it feels.

But wait, there's more...

I need help opening a bar here in the Mission in SF.  The bar will be called The Tragedies.  It'll be a very ironic place.  But we WILL set it up so that every night, people dressed in bright colors walk in and put some Sheryl Crow on the jukebox or like "I'm Walking On Sunshine" just so that everyone can turn and look and judge the people who are totally out of place.

The theme song for the joint will be "Tragedy" by the Bee Gees.  Can someone help me purchase the rights to the song from the Bee Gees?

Imagine being the bartender at this bar.  A hipster comes to the bar by himself and orders a pint of PBR.  The bartender hands him the beer and says, "How's your tragedy?"  The hipster rolls his eyes and sighs an annoyed sigh. 

Help me turn this dream into a reality!

En-raptured

The way I see it, any predictions about the end of the world or the rapture or whatever are reminiscent of email scams. They sound pretty plausible at first, but when you look a little more closely, you can find some of the tell-tale signs that it's completely fabricated.

1) Use of numerology without any meaning

I was going to write something, but then came across this. It captures a lot of my thinking, but actually has some sort of basis in research.


2) Reliance on human societal constructs

Harold Camping has declared that the end of the world will begin with New Zealand, one of the first countries to experience the "new" day. However, New Zealand is a COMPLETELY arbitrary starting point since we devised the International Date Line. With Y2K, this made sense. With the rapture, not so much.

Beyond that, the sole use of the solar calendar is also problematic since that is only one way to measure the passage of time. Since ancient religions (and Jesus) used a lunar calendar rather than a solar calendar, any prediction NOT based at least in part on the lunar calendar is ridiculous.

3) Reliance on Time as a constant

We're all familiar with our old pal Einstein and his "theory" of relativity. But time as most of us know it, is once again a societal construct. Relativity alone explains the following (that has been tested). Let's say you were about to board a plane to fly around the world non-stop. Just before you got on the plane, you synchronized your watch to a friend of yours who would stay on the ground and be waiting for you to land. Once you landed and compared watches, you would find that your watch is a little bit behind the watch of the person who stayed on the ground.

Look at this

4) The Bible tells us it's going to happen

No offense to any devout believers out there, but I've always had an issue with the whole, "the Bible tells us so" argument. Especially when the source that is cited is the King James Bible. The Bible has been translated so many times that it seems unlikely that one version is the "truth." And that completely overlooks cultural differences that are inherent in language and that certain things just don't translate from language to language.

My favorite example of this comes from the 10 Commandments. Commandment 6 is sometimes translates to say, "Thou shalt not murder." Other translations state, "Thou shalt not kill." The two are similar, but have very different meanings.


5) That the Rapture happens in our lifetime

This is the most telling feature that the rapture prediction is wrong - it puts way too much meaning on the present. The idea that we will be witness to the end of the world is a narcissistic notion. Give me a prediction that it will happen in 2500 years, and I am much more likely to believe you because there's nothing in it for you. But the idea that the messiah, the rapture, first contact from aliens, or the zombie apocalypse will happen in our lifetime is most likely due to a heightened sense of self-importance that is fairly rampant in the US.